Shaunti and Jeff Feldhan did some very compelling research into men and women’s perspectives in marriage, and they asked this simple question to the women in their study:
“What’s the most important thing you wish your husband/significant other knew, but feel you haven’t been able to explain in a way he understands?”
Can You Guess?
Relationships are complex, and God knows best of all how to be successful in them. He laid down some simple guidelines that speak to the heart of what men and women most want when He told husbands to love their wives and wives to respect their husbands. Read more about that in Love and Respect Make or Break your Marriage.
So, what do you think wives are yearning for their spouses to know?
You Are My Hero.
In varying ways with different words, this is what the women were saying in their responses.
They Respect Their Man
Take a look at some from the book For Men Only: A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women:
- “How deep my love and respect is for him.
- How much I appreciate him.
- How much I care for his happiness, feelings, and well-being
- How much I respect him as a person.
- I would trust him with my life.
- My husband means more to me than words can say. He is the true essence of what I dreamed a husband would be when I was a little girl.
- That I dearly appreciate his hard work.
- That I feel incredibly lucky to be with him today.
- When he puts himself down, it hurts me-one one should say bad things about my favorite guy.” page 181
Respect Him But Struggle To Show It
They found that most women really do respect their guy. The problem is, they don’t always know how to show it. Here is another question they asked:
“Is this statement true or false? ‘Although I may not always show it well, I do deeply need, respect, and desire my husband/significant other.
Base = Respondents who answered question 405
Check Out The Complete Survey
Check it out below and grab their book. It is really insightful! (I don’t get any kickbacks for promoting it, by the way). As I flipped through the book and looked at all their data and advice, I thought- man, I wish all husbands knew this stuff! I know it would help marriages and maybe even save quite a few.
I simply love their books For Men Only and For Women Only. So, what about husbands? What do they wish their wives knew? Stay tuned for my next blog. If you don’t want to miss it, be sure to subscribe by email by clicking on my homepage, scrolling down, entering your email, and then checking your inbox to confirm it.
What About You?
What would you most want your husband/significant other to know? Add it in the notes below-or better yet, keep trying to tell him:).
Want More Resources Like This?
This blog is designed to encourage you to engage deeply in the things that matter most to you, embrace wholly the relationships you treasure, and delight lavishly in the mundane and momentous of life.
- Love and Respect Make or Break your Marriage
- 3 Ways to Disrespect Your Husband (And Respectful Alternatives)
- Why Won’t He Ask for Directions?
- Who Talks More, Men or Women?